by Luke Winn

Thanksgiving weekend, among other things, was rivalry weekend in college football. I set an alarm for Friday’s 2:30 p.m. Colorado-Nebraska shocker on ABC. Saturday, in the same chair, I watched the Arizona-Arizona State brawl through Fox Sports Net’s grainy lens, followed by Oklahoma State’s stunning upset of Oklahoma. In the midst of my sloth-like fandom, I forgot the NU-Illinois game had even happened.

This was NU’s edition of rivalry week: A non-televised interstate showdown with an unoriginal trophy at stake, buried in the shuffle of turkey day’s morning hours. This scheduling debacle marred the fact that the ‘Cats put up a fight against No. 8-ranked Illinois, and the NU community appears to have lost little sleep over relinquishing the game’s traveling trophy, the Sweet Sioux Tomahawk. I wasn’t going to make a Thanksgiving Day road trip, but to see the score in Saturday’s paper and have my Badger cousin snidely remark, “Dude, your sh*t wasn’t even on T.V.” … Well, that got me to thinking.

Should Illinois really be our “big” rival? Does a successful season hinge on beating those rotten bastards from Champaign? Sure, if you went to Schaumburg and all yer ol’ buddies are down at “U of I”, it might matter. But for the rest of us, a win over Illinois means no more, if not less, than one over Michigan, Michigan State, Ohio State or even Wisconsin.

Nothing – not tired clichés, ass-chewings or motivational t-shirts – gets a team riled up more than a legitimate rivalry. NU needs a remedy for its lackluster history with Illinois, and the best available option is to quit the relationship altogether. I say write the folks at Illinois a nice letter informing them of our lack of interest in the rivalry; if they’re upset, tell them they can keep the Sweet Tomahawk for good. Then, without delay, get on the horn to South Bend, Ind., and start negotiating a long-term contract with the school that should be our rival – that’s right, Notre Dame.

NU and Notre Dame have locked horns a total of 47 times since 1889, with the last meeting occurring at Notre Dame Stadium on Sept. 2, 1995 – a 17-15 NU win that kick-started the most storied season in Wildcat history. So why, since then, have we neglected the potential of an annual non-conference matchup with the Fighting Irish? Can there be too much residual bitterness, or have our schedulers simply forgotten about Notre Dame?

The ’95 epic aside, it’s hard to keep the Irish off your mind. Haven’t you watched Rudy on TNT yet this week? Or Regis on ABC? Did you forget where all those crew-cut Catholics from your high school went to college? Most importantly, are you in denial that the likes of Zak Kustok, Jeff Roehl and Jovan Witherspoon were former members of the ND bench?

A NU-ND tradition is bound to be heated. Just imagine: The school that offers safe harbor and opportunity for the Irish’s disgruntled reserves finally unleashes them on the Golden Dome to get revenge. Thousands would make the 2-hour trip east or west each year.

So much would be at stake: Bragging rights in the Chicago media and workforce, blue chip prospects in the suburban recruiting war and most likely, heavy gambling dollars. A traveling trophy would undoubtedly be in order. Or even better, a friendly wager between Randy Walker and whoever replaces Bob Davie: If NU wins, Rudy stays off cable for a year. If ND wins, a replica of “Touchdown Jesus” gets draped over the south wall of Welsh-Ryan Arena until the teams’ next meeting. Hillel would be up in arms, but the contest, I’m guessing, would be a hit.

Then again, I may not have thought this all the way through. NU’s athletic department wouldn’t want to cheat its fans out of a prolonged, non-televised series against Duke or a road trip to Annapolis. Three non-conference patsies means three less Big Ten wins needed for a bowl. And who needs a rivalry when we’ve got a pushover like Bowling Green on the schedule?

With their December calendar open to ponder what went wrong, here’s an excellent project for the athletic department. I’ll even shovel the trap and throw in the Lucky Charms; you guys just reel in the leprechauns and embark upon a real rivalry for NU football.

Luke Winn is referring to himself in the third person. You can reach him at l-winn@northwestern.edu.

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